Colleges that accept 50% or more of their applications AND where ALL your stats fall above the 50th percentile.
Safety schools are not based on your SAT score. They should be chosen based on affordability first, then on acceptance rate, and where your stats fall in relation to the college's norms.
It isn't a safety if you can't afford to attend. Run the net price calculators on all your potential colleges.

Setting yourself apart from thousands of other applicants can seem an impossible task. So, let’s concentrate on some of the more realistic goals that can help you submit an application that provides a better understanding of who you are. My advice? Be your authentic self, research the school/major/etc., answer the question, and think about how you can articulate why you are a good fit with this school.
To that end, ask yourself these questions before starting your essays: Why are you applying to this school? What do you like about the major, the program, the support resources, the clubs/organizations, etc.? Think about these things and work them into your application. For example, SHA is a specialized business-management program. When students apply to SHA, they know they can go into real estate, finance, law, food and beverage, or operations, but we want to make sure that they are service-minded and understand that hospitality is everywhere. We want to know what the business of hospitality means to them.
Your essays should reveal something of your identity, about who you are, instead of trying to make yourself something that you think the admissions counselors want to see. Good essays are self-reflective and authentic. You will likely have your advisor, a parent, you best friend, and others read your essays. Proofreading is a good thing and is recommended, but don’t allow your authentic self to be scrubbed clean of the essay you submit.

It isn’t so much overusing topics, but rather considering what each element of the application contributes toward painting a picture of who you are. There are many complementary components of an application and each one serves a purpose. Take the time to look at your application holistically and think like an admissions counselor—what is missing? What should I emphasize to tell my story? I recommend writing what you know.
I remember an essay many years ago from an applicant who told the story of running for class president every year in high school, and every year, another classmate won the election. It was a simple essay, but what I learned from those four paragraphs was that this applicant would try and try again. This applicant had potential to lead and was interested in taking a leadership position. This applicant had a sense of humor and was willing to take a chance.
Leadership is a topic that many of you will choose for your college essays. You might say this topic is overused, but if you tell your own story and not the formulaic story you might be tempted to think we’re looking for, it is likely that your essay will be distinctive and authentic—and a valuable asset to your overall application.

The idea of putting a 16-year-old kid fully in the driver’s seat and saying, “Your ball, go ahead, you’re in charge,” feels a little risky, feels a little daunting. Obviously, parents are there to back their kids up.
Don't compare your child to siblings, don't compare them to other kids, don't compare them to yourself. As a working parent, you don't have a lot of time with your child. Often getting help from an expert will aliviate the stress from the process and will bring positive results. Playing the blame game is not how a family should end up at the end of this process.

I am familiar with the mindset behind her resistance, as many of my high school students shared similar (albeit, somewhat absurd) views.

In many cases, they applied to over a dozen of the top schools--including all the (H/Y/P) and end up being accepted in at least one.
Her perspective isn't necessarily about the acceptance rate itself; but more likely, about the perceived prestige and name recognition of the school.
• While the proud alumni of many schools might disagree; it should be noted that beyond a few big (Harvard, and perhaps Princeton, Yale, MIT, etc), there is very little marketability in the real world that distinguishes almost any other school from another. It has been said that ‘saying you went to Harvard' is perhaps the biggest takeaway from going to Harvard (I wouldn't disagree). With most other schools, people barely notice the school name, etc. (It is a point worth considering).
At the root of her argument is the prestige of that institution--either in the name (e.g. being able to “drop the H bomb”), or in the selectivity of that school -- addressing that point (covertly, or otherwise), or appealing to her desire for prestige, will help you gain traction in your future discussions with her.
It should be noted that merely wanting/feeling entitled to acceptance at a top school, is hardly sufficient; and that perspective is quite often the case for those who (in all reality) are not exactly a top candidate for a top school.
In many cases, that hard-line ego, is reflecting a person's failure to fully accept the reality of their chances (e.g. not wanting to face that reality, and thus, applying a hard-line limitation, in the wishful hopes of being accepted at a top school). Sometimes, it works out; but often, it does not.
Her intended major/field of study is important to the question, as it directly impacts the options to be considered, and the probability of acceptance.
Personally, I wouldn't consider Berkeley, but not due to admissions—I believe it to be a great school, but I believe there might be other/better options to consider, if she is indeed a competitive candidate at the level you suggest--and it should be noted that Berkeley does have a certain stigma that might/might not always be well-received (there is a stereotype of Berkeley producing idealistic, ultra-liberal types, etc).
I would suggest to consider some of the other (perhaps lesser-known, but equally elite) prestigious schools--which often have similar acceptance rates, and with equally-elite alumni/reputation--sometimes referred to as “Little Ivies” or other similar classification.
Williams College — a top liberal arts college, it is often weighed alongside Harvard, and as an alternative to Harvard.
While it tends to be less-known within society at-large; it is well known within elite circles, and produces alumni that are on-par with Harvard; and is likewise well-regarded by traditional Ivy League schools (if opting to transfer, or when applying to grad school).
Very much an elite school — have your daughter look at the Wikipedia page (etc) and/or Google search the alumni — and I believe she might be convinced of it's prestige. There are more prominent graduates of Williams College than most people ever realize.
Acceptance rate is noted at ~12%, which is close to, and/or approximately on-par with, many top schools.
New York University, Stern School of Business (NYU-Stern) — if considering a business program, few are regarded as elite as NYU-Stern.
Applying to NYU-Stern (at least, when I applied) was handled separately from normal NYU admissions, and with an ~8% acceptance rate.
Very well-respected, prestigious, and elite, NYU-Stern is a notable option--if considering business.
Tulane University — an excellent option (sometimes regarded “almost Ivy”), it is often considered alongside many of the schools being mentioned, and is regarded a Tier 1 school.
Tulane is a common backup school to those who are genuinely competitive for admission to Ivy League schools—it is a safety school, that isn't really a stereotypical “safety school” for those who seek a prestigious school, and don't want the typical “safety school” stigma that sometimes might apply to some safety schools.
It is very-respectable, prestigious, elite school, that someone can attend proudly, without having to feel the need to explain with a caveat (as might be the case with some options).
Those who apply to Harvard, Princeton, Yale, Dartmouth, UChicago, Williams, etc, will typically submit an application to Tulane as well, in my personal experience, and likewise among my prep school and Ivy League classmates.
To assist your daughter, it would be helpful to realize and accept the reality of her mindset: she is seeking a school with prestige, and that she deems to be 'brag-worthy' in some way.
If you focus your discussions, by highlighting the prestige elements of other schools, I believe your daughter might be a bit more open to consider a few more options, and your family might get through this impasse a bit more smoothly.